knuckles and gauges

So Young Finance Guy is abroad right now for a business trip and then European vacation which means I'm back to riding the bus until April. In the space of approximately 24 hours, I have had not one, not two, but three (three!) Strange Bus Encounters. Consider:

Encounter #1
Older black guy stares at me intensely for most of morning commute. Turns out that he was lusting after my copy of the RedEye. Strangely enough, that does not make it any less creepy.

Encounter #2
White guy about my age, very tall, very loud, like Jason Segel might be if he were an amateur consultant. I can feel him looking at me from across the aisle as I work on my crossword. He reaches over and taps me on the arm. "Hey, what happened to your knuckles?" he asks.

WELL. A few weeks back, I had skin lesions on the back of my hand sliced off and frozen. Bled everywhere, very gross, still wearing bandages.

Not quite the flirty answer Loudmouth was looking for.

Encounter #3
Loudmouth and a few friends are waiting for the same morning bus as me. He makes a few more comments about my knuckles (so charming), asks my name, promptly loses interest in talking to me when he spots another girl he knows coming off a different bus. "Heyyy! Why didn't you tell me you were taking this bus? Hey, you trying to avoid me? You know, if I had your number, I could have texted you this morning about what bus I'd be on, you know, dialed it in, you could've checked and been like 'Hey, gotta avoid this guy!'" Uber charming! The poor girl rolled her eyes and walked away to call someone on the phone. Loudmouth jokes that she's calling the cops on him. What a gentleman!

So we get on the bus, and Loudmouth's friend with gauges in his ears takes the seat in front of mine. I pull out my book. A few moments later, this conversation ensued:

Gauges: Excuse me, but what are you reading?
Me: [holds up the book: Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood]
Gauges: [visibly crestfallen as he reads the title] Oh.
Me: [goes back to reading]
Gauges: [tries again] Do you read lots of books?
Me: Yes.
Gauges: Yeah, well, I'm looking for some books to read, you know, do you have any recommendations? I'm on like a book kick. [He waits, nervously defiant]
Me: [relenting] I don't know, what kinds of books do you like to read?
Gauges: Well, the last book I read was called "Sex at Dawn" and it was about the development of sexuality in the beginning ages.
Me: Oh. Well, that sounds interesting...
Gauges: I like a lot of non-fiction. Hermann Hesse is my favorite writer, you know, Siddhartha?
Me: Oh, yes. I've never read it though.
Gauges: [determined] Yeah, I like him a lot. Sometimes I just spend hours at the library, you know, just looking through books? I love it. Just love it.
Me: Yes, that's good. Um, well, maybe you'd like Michael Crichton? Lost World, Jurassic Park, Timeline. Guys tend to like that kind of stuf.
Gauges: I'm not really into fiction. I like non-fiction, biographies, stuff that really makes you think. Makes you think deeper.
Me: Oh. I think all I read is fiction.
Gauges: [sounding desperate] I read the whole Twilight series though. I don't know why! I just couldn't put them down, I had to read them all. I thought they were really good.
Me: I didn't read any of them.
Gauges: [disbelief] Why not?
Me: Not really into the whole vampires thing, I guess.
Gauges: Oh. [pause] Wow, this is really not off to a good start.

I could barely keep from laughing, it was all very awkward-high-school, especially since his thought process was very easy to read. After a while, Gauges asked me how old I was, told me that he often spoke with "older people" about these things, then doubled-back and tried to reassure me that he didn't mean that I personally looked old or older, he just wanted to know how old I was. (He's 21.) I did feel sort of bad that I couldn't offer him any book suggestions, and he told me that it was okay, that he was sure we'd see each other on the bus again and to just let him know what I thought of anything. Hilarious. And mostly harmless. Seemed like a nice guy.