bacon makes everything better

You know what pot smells like to me? Wet socks and cooked cabbage. Like a kind of stanky musky smell that's also a little bit green and sweet. I despise wet socks. And I don't particularly care for cooked cabbage.

And I hate, hate, HATE it when my entire freaking building smells like gross wet socks and cooked cabbage and gross disgusting weed. And because it's been grey and raining outside for the last two days, opening a window is not an option so everything is just like...sitting around, stagnant and mixing with the normal gross old-building smell awkwardly like hormones at a middle-school dance.

I hate pot! I hate middle schools! I hate it! I hate it! I hate it!

Ahem. Sorry for the juvenile temper-tantrum, but I don't think it's too much to ask to live in an apartment that doesn't smell Satan's armpit in Detroit during a maple syrup festival near a dog-food factory.

This is where bacon comes in.

Bacon is amazing. It is a wonder-food. It makes everything taste like awesome. To make myself feel better (and b/c I was working from home today), I decided to cook up a few slices of bacon to nibble on while I made inroads into the fascinating world of warehouse accident prevention (our warehouses are super safe! Yay!).

Turns out, when you make bacon in a poorly-ventilated building, everything will then smell like bacon. My entire apartment smells like bacon. The hallway smells like bacon. My coat smells like bacon. My bedsheets smell like bacon, which I actually find kind of disturbing, but hey, at least it doesn't smell like pot.

Bacon. It's the answer to all the world's ills.